Post-Grad Reflections (+ A Response to my younger self)

Hi! So yesterday afternoon I officially GRADUATED WOOOOOO! There were a lot of times I didn’t think I’d make it this far for one reason or another, so I’m glad I stuck it out. I have a lot of mixed feelings on it, some happy some more melancholic. For a really long time I thought I wouldn’t feel anything graduating because well, I didn’t have a lot to hold onto irl for a long while, but since joining my creative program I’ve made so so many wonderful friends.

For the first time in my life, I’ve had genuine hope for my future and have had it proven over and over again. So obviously, having that kinda on a time limit was Really Scary. However, if I’ve learned anything from having wonderful online friends as well is that connections don’t stop happening as long as you work to maintain them, and I want to do my best to maintain contact with the people I have now! I’ve survived worse, so I know I can survive this. And regardless, I have learned so so much in these last 2 years especially that I know I can make it through.

THE CEREMONY!

There isn’t too much to say about the actual graduation ceremony itself tbh. We practiced 3 times and it was burning hot out. I probably got sun burnt at least once LOL. Originally I was gonna go with my family to eat at a Hibachi style restaurant (since I used to love it when I was a kid when we used to live elsewhere) but uhhh unfortunately that went south when the place was completely packed 💀 whoops. So we ended up going to a different restaurant nearby and I actually ran into my friend who works THERE LOL!! It was really sweet! Honestly, I am so glad we ended up eating at home because eating out with family often makes me feel exhausted + nervous, and the food was genuinely really good!

I mentioned decorating my grad cap in a previous post, so you can take a look at it below again if you’re curious! Stuff’s blurred for privacy ofc but it’s Bewilthred themed because of course it is.



Additionally, while we didn’t get our real diplomas on stage (they set it up so that we’d get our real ones when we returned our gowns 💀), it was genuinely so surreal to actually hold it in my hands and see people out there cheering for me. Like damn! This is such a major chapter in my life and it’s just…done. Wow. When I got my real diploma though, I also got a letter I had COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN ABOUT!!! WTF!!! So apparently on orientation day I had to write a letter to my future self, and I got it back! So the rest of this blog post will essentially be me responding to that letter, cause why not! And I think it’s a good indicator of how far I’ve come.

Anyways, without further ado, let’s see what younger Blanki had to say!

Past Me's Letter

First of all, goodness GRACIOUS the eon doodle….so freaking silly!!! It also really puts into perspective how much my art has changed…he’s so rotund….I’ve for sure improved a lot!

Addressing the biggest goal, Bewilthred isn’t “completed” yet, but I’ve definitely made a lot more big projects with it since writing that letter! The biggest probably being Training Practice and the Zephyr Revamp in general. I think at the time of writing this, I was still envisioning Bewilthred to be a fully finished webcomic, but nowadays I think it’s more fun (and also easier on me with real life responsibilities) to have it just be a multi media project with a script I for sure want to finish in full someday. I think past me would be proud of what I’ve done even if it hasn’t gone in the way they “expected”, I admittedly had a very skewed view of how school progression would go but then again who doesn’t when they’re that young? It happens man.

I think its also really funny that Madeon being my favorite music artist hasn’t changed in like 4 years lol. I hope past me knows that he is RELEASING A NEW ALBUM SOON RAHHHHHH!!! Madeon’s new work as of late has been exceptional, and I honestly think if I were to pick one song to show past me what was coming…hmmmm….I’d probably pick “Super Platinum” (I NEED IT SO BAD GUYS YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND). I’d also sneak in the Victory Live remix of La Lune since it includes a snippet of Beings! I’ve imagined so many Bewilthred scenes to the Victory live set…I need to make at least one animatic one of these days to it…

Loving to draw still being the same makes sense, I still do and probably always will! Also I am still friends with the majority of the people I listed! My friends Hari (listed as Jasper), Toast, and Malak (listed as Asmo) are still very dear to me. I’ve for SURE made a lot more friends since then though! So many I can’t possibly fathom naming them all. But I am so thankful to have them everyday, they’re the reason I’m even here writing this blog post for you all!

Censored my age of when I was writing but JESUS it was a flashbang. I was literally only a sauce old bro. My aspirations have changed since writing as well, so to give a more updated view, I want to be a storyteller in whatever form in my future. I’d specifically would love to do something related to animation, but it doesn’t have to be! I love multi-media work so I’d feel sad if I only ended up going into one subject matter. I also really love overseeing/connecting people during projects, so taking on a managerial role would be awesome honestly!

Given the school I will be attending soon, I’ll for sure have a lot of experience in all of those things. I’m really excited for it! And I know past me would be excited for me too. I know one of my biggest fears especially early on in school was that I wouldn’t get into ANY upper education, that I wouldn’t be “good enough”, but I know now that I was always more than enough and besides, upper education standards are complete bullshit anyways. Let’s be frank, as long as you have the money to pay, you can get into somewhere good. But I also can’t lie to myself and say that I didn’t work my ASS off to get where I am now.

Past me constantly put down their accomplishments, their work, their talent, and I still do sometimes, but I’ve learned more to appreciate my abilities and I’m so proud of myself for that. It’s what’s truly helped me feel prepared for the future. And you know what? I think that’s really beautiful.

The letter ends with hoping I’ll become something that I’ll be proud of. I’m glad to report I am absolutely someone I’m proud of now. Maybe sometimes that pride wavers, but I know that it’s there. I’m so very excited to see what’s next! I wish myself good luck, just as my past self did over 4 years ago now, and I know that despite it all, I’ll be okay!

I can’t wait to see who I’m meant to be.

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